Agency starts with the mind. Your mind is the only thing in this world with which you have complete control. No one else can make you think the thoughts you think. They can try and persuade you to think the way they want you to think, but you choose your thoughts. This means you choose your emotions, since your emotions are the product of what you have been thinking.
No one can see the thoughts you choose. They can hear what you are saying, see what you are feeling (emotions), but only you know the thoughts that have brought you to this point. Because of this fact only you can change your life by changing your perspective. Other people can persuade you to think and believe a certain way, but they can’t force you.
This is important to remember when you are trying to achieve something that involves other people. It is also the reason why many people who deal with the law of attraction tell you that you can’t control the how. Many people will say that the “how” is not up to you. This is correct when you are focusing on getting other people to do what you want them to do.
I like how Sierra describes this principle. She said, “I get tips from being a hostess. I would love to be tipped lots, but each passenger has his/her agency. I can hope for the best. Treat people the best so that they will be pleased with my service, but in the end it is up to them to tip me. If they don’t believe in tipping, then they probably won’t tip me no matter how good I am.”
The posts this week will look at how accepting other people’s agency can affect our ability to feel disappointment and frustration. How are you using your agency?