Category Archives: Your Frequency

Direct Consequences

I have two sons that believe two totally different things about me, and their belief affects the way I care for each of them. One son believes I treat the other son better because that son is the baby. What the older son doesn’t realize is that the younger son has been listening to me when I say, “What is important to you is important to me.” Instead of believing that I don’t care about him, like the older son does, the younger son believes that “Mom will stick up for me if I make my feelings known.” And sure enough, I stick up for him.

The problem is that my older son doesn’t believe I will stick up for him. Plus, he isn’t humble enough to grasp the concept that if he changes his way of thinking, then I’ll change my way of behaving towards him.

This is what happens. I don’t stick up for the older son because he complains about how awful I am instead of telling me what he would like to have happen positively in the future. If the older son were to change his belief, I would change my behavior. He would then see that I love him just as much as his younger brother. But it takes humility for him to realize he is the cause of his problem.

I’m Right and You’re Wrong

Lately, my husband and I have had an issue come up where we have had opposite opinions. He’ll say, “I know I’m right.” and I’ll say, “I know I’m right.” The more we turned the issue into a sparring match over who’s right, the more anger we felt towards one another. When I realized thatContinue Reading

Humility is the Power to Forgive

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines humility as “not thinking of yourself as better than other people.” If you think about the relationships that mean the most to you, I bet you will find that all of those people not only love you, but also see you as valuable. Feeling valuable to the person with whom youContinue Reading

Two Sides of a Story

The other day while I was channel surfing during my work out on the Elliptical machine at the sports center, I shifted between two news stations. One was a local station and the other was CNN. On CNN the reporter was interviewing several people to give their view of how Sarah Palin did when sheContinue Reading

More than an Attitude

In my book, DiSemblance, Boston doesn’t define her alcoholic mother as a fool. Instead, she keeps a more compassionate attitude towards her. This attitude enables her to help her mother and then inadvertently help herself (Boston’s perspective): “Mom!” I (Boston) yell, as I open the front door to my house and rush inside. Darting throughContinue Reading

Destroys Compassion

Last week we talked about how when you call someone a fool you devalue them by increasing your sense of self-righteousness. This week I’d like to talk about how increasing your sense of self-righteousness creates an attitude towards the person which destroys the compassion/love you feel for them. How does this work? For example, let’sContinue Reading

Judgment and the Golden Rule

Jesus Christ said, “. . . For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.” (St Matthew 7:1-2) Webster’s dictionary defines measure as “an estimate of what is to be expected (as of a person or situation).” You can’t let yourContinue Reading

Great Power in Turning the Other Cheek

When you choose to turn the other cheek and remain in a positive mental state, then you have more power to shift the other person to a positive place because it has been proven scientifically that positive mental energy is 1,000 times more powerful than negative energy. Recently, my child’s boss called me because myContinue Reading

When Turning the Cheek is Hard to Do

Since we’ve already talked about why you would want to turn the other cheek, today we are going to talk about how you actually do it. Someone might say, “That’s easy, all you have to do is walk away from a volatile situation without striking back when someone hurts you.” Many times theorizing is muchContinue Reading